Doldrums

I've been a bit low this past couple of weeks ( unusual for me especially when Holly the dogs dads been away and all is peace with just me and my dog!) but it was exactly round this time sat year my Dear Oldster began to really decline and my role as carer became pretty much full time. Coincidentally it oincided with the childrens summer holiday club which starts today. This is at the church I was attached to and because I'd committed to it last year I am running it again this year and I'm annoyed ! I'm annoyed that the minister I worked with for eight years and never had disagreement  with. Has got my hackles up. He's never been then most organised person but that was never a problem cos I was there to pick up behind him , but now I'm locum with responsibilities and commitments elsewhere I'm hacked off at his lack f support and assumption that everything will work out ok ( mainly because we all run around  making sure it is!) I'm also two of my best team down so coupled with that and the overwhelming memories I have of all that was happening ths time lat year I don't feel at my best for this. Been thinking I never really took time to grieve. So its all still there. I nursed him till his last breath. A week after the funeral I was at my probationary placement, then study and conferences, weddings, my ordination the year flew past at an alarming rate. I know tht without God beside me beneath me around me below me above me I couldn't have managed. And I love love love what I'm called to do as someone said at church yesterday it's a great fit!
 But in spite of that I'm still annoyed  that ths week I'm going to run myself ragged  organising a totally disorganised collegue ! Grrr need grace in abundance